I have a stomachache. Probably has something to do with all that coke I had last night, in my attempts to stay awake. Well, it fucking worked. Or maybe it's something to do with my early morning snack of a milo bar and pizza shapes. Yuck. OR it could have been from my little lets-try-and-stay-awake exercise session at 7am. Oh dear god. I think it's fair to say that my brain swtiches off at night, narcissisticly not taking note of whether I'm up and alert or crashed out on the floor.
I nearly brokedown yesterday. Of enlightenment.
My dream that night is so confusing, I won't even bother trying to explain it. Bottom line is, that 'you are the music in me' song from HSM2 was the main event. It clung onto my brain and wouldn't fall off into my unconscious with the rest of my dream. As I walked to school an hour later, I decided to listen to the song. So i flicked through my iPod and clicked play.
As soon as the opening notes flood through the headphones, I'm entranced. As the song deepens, so does my train of thought, which had now been taken over by my subconscious. My dream is right there, in front of my eyes! Replaying itself for me as the song progresses. Strangely enough, I can still see the environment around me too. Every detail of both shows was that little bit more existent. Every colour I could see intensified. Every ribbon of emotion pushed itself at me.
Suddenly it got too much and I started tearing up. My legs turned to jelly. I felt like collapsing on the footpath, curling up into a ball and crying for hours.
You have to understand that I've never felt something like that before. Is it possible to feel privilaged, intelligent, free, bewildered and helpless all at the same time? Imagine that. Now, times it by 2 billion.
I still don't know what happened to me that morning.
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